A Power Within

Author: Susie Page 17 of 30

Life is Fragile – Love Is Not

May 2009 013

Life Is Fragile – Love is Not.

 

So spins our lives in turning chasms of change,
blurred and slippery as water
cascading over slimy rocks,
my wordless gesture in troubled times
invades your worried mind,
fiercely as the brushing hand to restless horse
my smile confirms, to reassure your fretful gaze,
as hell as life sometimes appears
in daily disclosing of newer pain,
my heart swoops and suffers,
my misty eyes, my soul knows
life is fragile, but love is not.

 

As birds black and shiny soar
to ‘crow’ in noisy rattle begin,
another nasty turn like sin,
to stab in pain, to etch within,
to reproduce in making bold this latest evidence,
dismissing in magicians wand, I wave again
I wave again…
To struggle and plunge I flounder there
impeach myself, still always care,
frightened, damp and cold
my misty eyes, my soul knows
life is fragile, but love is not
love is not…

 

All Rights Reserved  @  May 2009

Poet Laureate – Carol Ann Duffy.

How pleased I was to hear the news, that the very brilliant poet Carol Ann Duffy has been chosen to be our new Poet Laureate. I have been a devotee of  her wonderful poems for sometime now, especially her wonderful book “Rapture” which is essential reading for those of us,  lucky to understand that  poems can help us, even during the most painful episodes in our lives.  Her poems are really profound, humane longings of passion, they can and do speak for so many of us. Well done Carol Ann Duffy who is also the  very  first woman Poet.

Further Poems Of Love.

Can be found at http://www.susiehemingway.blogspot.com

“Breath of Life – My Partner” by Susie Hemingway.

 
This poem is dedicated to the partners  and love ones of the  EMS/Firefighters in Providence Rhode Island USA and to the Paramedics and Firefighters World-Wide.

 

Fresh blood falls upon our streets
like dark red satin smooth upon a bed,
wild trees blow and hang their limbs,
as pain strews all living things,
still within, as snug as partners curl
upon a furry rug in fire glow,
my mind tells me you’re safe
my heart knows you are there,
you are the sunlight in my arms…

 

My heart impaled, transfixed in fear
when world rocks life so bitter and cruel
this struggle for peace so gently brave,
in quiet times, as I survey the scene
and in frightening moments of terror
come fragrant as a summer rose,
thoughts of  you…to clear my mind.
you are the sunlight in my arms,
you are my breath of life…

 

” How harsh, how tough, these long days
how precious your honourable soul,
how undemanding how much you care
this ready smile of a brave man
and as you fight for strength, this daily task
your right of sovereignty is quietly protected,
this stillness comes, our land is covered,
lives are changed”

 

But, still you are the sunlight in my arms
Still, you are my partner,
Still you are my breath of life…

 

All Rights Reserved @ April 2009

 

More comments on  “Breath Of Life – My Partner” shown on
http://www.susiehemingway.blogspot.com

3.06.2009 Have heard today from Paul Embery, Regional Offical, London Region, FBU, that this poem has been  circulated to all members of the London Fire Brigade.

Hamada Update – 24 April 2009

Some awaited tests came back yesterday for those who understand and like to follow Hamada’s journey.
The Skeletal Scan clearly shows the L1, L2 and T8 collapse and now there is a small area showing in the pelvic area,which is to be expected but of course still very worrying.
The Bence Jones is holding at 0.03 but the Para Protein (M-Spike ) is up again, now at 8.4 but not at the speed of the past 3 Months.

The Bone Marrow returned at 5%. better than we had hoped for – was 80% at diagnosis in May 2006 – Stem Cell Transplant achieved to good partial remission in October 2007.
Still, there is to be no further treatment at the moment apart from the massive amounts of maintenance drugs daily, even though the M-Spike is rising…the consultants view is to watch and wait.
I would welcome any comments on these readings from those who understand. Thank you.

Our very best and heartfelt thoughts to all our friends and carers who read this blog, and are making with courage, the same journey as Hamada.

Through My Eyes – by Susie Hemingway

The music, distant, dusty but ours from years ago…

fills my mind and soul
my toes in shiny heels do tap,
my face in smiles my hands do clap,
and through my eyes, absorbed and clear
such beautiful faces, sitting here,
these sparkling eyes, this crowded room,
so young, peaceful, handsome, so alive…
just enjoying each other, just being together.
I hear their laughter I place my hand on his,
through my eyes I see them here
through my eyes I see it all…
All rights reserved @ 2009. – Written about the evening of the 18 April 2009

Indeed A Wonderful Weekend !

Hamada and I spent such a wonderful four days with younger son Jo in the beautiful Chilterns, Bucks. Jo and his beautiful Laura, entertained and looked after us so very well. It was such a delight to do nothing for the long weekend and so many thanks to Jenny and Ian who helped Hamada to make this journey with help travelling, and all the necessary carrying of extra ‘bits and bobs’ to make Hamada as comfy as could be. Hamada managed so well, but still having to sleep once again after breakfast, enabling him to join the fun in the evening. It was a super time, some good shopping and lots of laughter for me with the girls and wonderful party times in the evenings with superb dinners – Jo being a consummate chef – and not having to cook a single thing the whole weekend, thanks Laura, was an extra treat. It was really special to catch up with family and friends, to see Rich and James once again, they had grown up with Jo and had frequented our family home in earlier years and are now young men. Thank you Jo and Laura, I am sure you noticed the extra sparkle in Hamada’s eyes X

Hamada Continues Well At Easter-Time

Photo: Easter Sunday Last Year ! – 2008.

Hamada is continuing well, and we plan to have a small Easter-time celebration at ‘Orchard End’ with a good Roast Dinner and some Chocolate Treats. Hamada is not well enough to join the wonderful Easter Breakfast which after watching the Sunrise at a local beauty spot, is celebrated together with friends at the Village Hall. Always a lovely occasion, especially last year with the sudden onset of snow!
This week we had a very comprehensive consultation at Nephrology at Lincoln, going over carefully all the drugs Hamada takes. Then a good discussion with the specialist Ms Little, her very considered view being, that Hamada’s kidneys are just functioning enough without the need for Dialysis. Dialysis may just give him a little more energy but not enough for the dramatic change to Hamada’s quality of life that would ensue, with this irreparable (for Hamada)procedure, the need also – if not done at home- for the four days per week, journey to Lincoln. This with all the other clinic visits, would be far too much for him to endure. So we are thankful that his kidneys are holding on. We believe this has been achieved with the very good amounts of water taken daily to flush through the proteins that prevent the kidneys from filtering waste products from the blood. When Hamada was diagnosed almost three years ago he had only 8% kidney function he now has 15%. We still await the results of the latest Bence Jones 24hr test, also the Bone Marrow Biopsy and the Skeletal Scan.

We wish our very good family, friends, at this special ‘Spring Time’ who with watchful eyes, continue to support us -how lucky we are to have you – and to all fellow Multiple Myeloma sufferers, a very “Happy Easter” or “Happy Spring Feast”

Preparing For the Village Spring Flower Show.

I have spent the morning baking for our Village Spring Flower Show, which is tomorrow.  In the morning I will pick a  flower or two and some nice greenery, to make a small display to enter. There are not  many flowers in my garden that are in bloom at the moment, mostly daffodils but I will see what I can come up with. Although listed as a flower show, there is always a very successful baking section, a wonderful display of scrumptious home baking.  Cakes, scones, flans, jams, lemon-curds all manner of goodies . There are some very fine cooks and chefs in the Village but it’s always great fun to enter even as a novice. Some of the men, who would never normally cook  have a  go, and I can vouch that some of their  flapjacks turn out to be very fine indeed!  When the serious business of  judging is over, all the items are auctioned off, which is such great fun, causing a lot of merriment, as we all get to bid on each others offerings and very often go home with something special for tea.

Lavender and bakes for the Spring Flower Show April 2009 011

Shown above: Two simple fruit cakes with a little touch of  brandy in each. One ‘old fashioned’ Apple-pie, and Two,  Ham, Mustard, Egg and Cheese Flans.

Published Again!

How nice to be published today in this unusual collection of  poetry.  These poems were written by a group of  this country’s poets about life here in the UK.  Putting together their feelings, thoughts and opinions about their homeland which defines our unique culture and spirit.  A somewhat different style for me, as I am known for my ‘poems of  love’  see  http://www.susiehemingway.blogspot.com  still in many ways my poem written about Horncastle  and shown here below, is still in a way, a poem of love. 

Heartland 30.03.2009 

Published by United Press Ltd 2009.

Well It Seems Like Spring Has Come ?

March 29 2009 004

It’s been a long Winter this year but today the sun shone as tender shoots  started to turn green. The vivid yellow of the Laburnum was in evidence from my windows and the air had that little hint.  As the sheep returned to the fields even the Cat came along to saviour this glorious sunny morning. Yes, I know we had heavy snow here last year  on Easter  Sunday! when it was even difficult to get in and out of  the village but although chilly today, it indeed feels like Spring has come. 

March 29 2009 009March 29 2009 012

I Watch – by Susie Hemingway

In watchful reverence as slumber creeps
Comes the silver rays that cast shadows on my walls
My pen doth scratch the paper,
In breaking silence comes my poetry by moonlight,
Rest quietly beloved, with your rendezvous in dreams
This daily plunder systematically steals your frame
But nought can rob your soul.
This modicum of peace, this repose in sleep.
I proffer my heart as my hand trembles in writing,
Just your breath faint and steady, holds my heart.
And as the clouds cross the quivering rays
Leaving my heart in darkness,
In breaking silence, comes my poetry by moonlight…

All Rights Reserved :@ 2009
“I Watch” has been selected to be published in a forthcoming book by United Press called ‘Poetry By Moonlight’

A Second Opinion

It was such an important Consultation for Hamada yesterday – as Para Protein/M Spike is now at an alarming 8.1 – we gained a much desired second opinion.
Armed with all our questions and with no time limits, we discussed once again, any treatments now open to Hamada.. Our Doctor Angel who had been studying Hamada’s blood chemistry and massive amount of medical notes also agreed, that to try with Velcade at the present time is not an option. He also suggested that another drug combination, one that has not been tried before, maybe sought further on. Hamada’s blood CBC is very poor and damage from any of these strong ‘chemo’ drugs, may do more harm than good, spoiling what quality of life he enjoys now. The consultant has requested another Skeletal Screening and a further Bone Marrow Biopsy. These will take place this coming Monday. So it is final that at the moment it is a wait and observe approach. The Doctor answered every question frankly and clearly which is how we like it. It was a good consultation and I feel that all is being done for dear Hamada.

Clicky Web Analytics

Clicky

The Not So Humble Scone.

 

 Scones 4

How delightful afternoon tea is. Not much beats this, in my opinion. Yes of course  it should be the real deal, of  tiny thin crust-less sandwiches filled with such delights as salmon and cucumber or potted paste. Then to follow a nice slice of rich homemade fruit cake, all serve-up with a good quality pot of  tea. It is such an English tradition, that still works well, even if  only during the weekends of  our busy lives.  But what about  the humble scone, which is often neglected, still cheap to make and can turn in a minute, into the most delicious tea-time treat, with a good portion of whipped cream and topped with some really wonderful  strawberry jam. When the need for a full high-tea is not  required, this little humble cake can been perfect. It  is also such a useful stop-gap when having a house full of  weekend guests, particularly if you are to eat out or perhaps later in the evening. It makes a focus to the afternoon, gathering  guests together for a cosy afternoon chat.  Always remember, that the not so humble scone, makes a very reasonable quick and scrumptious tea time treat which never seems to stay on the plate for long.

Well You Have To Take A Pie.

Decided to make a giant 13 inch Chicken Pie to take on Saturday for the “Pie and Pea do” at the Village Hall.  I do hope they enjoy.

March 13 2009 Chicken Pie for Pie and Peas - Village Hall 003

Clicky Web Analytics

Clicky

Page 17 of 30

Powered by WordPress & Theme by Anders Norén