A Power Within

Tag: illness

Going Down

Going Down…

How fast life changed
I torpedoed to the bottom
I crashed and fell…
Legs forgot how to work
as furnace burnt into my chest
and a sea of dampness turned
my head into a torrent of water.

I shivered and shook, the severity of rigours
that could not be controlled.
I couldn’t remember my name but
two people could, they gathered me,
pulled me back, fought for me, I could hear them…
Strong words spoke for me, kind hands helped in every way.
I closed my eyes and drifted to that easier place…

Blue lights and strong hands, noise and speed,
“is the speed scary Mam” the ambulance medic asked,
I do remember saying I though it all rather exciting,
as needles went into my hands, and oxygen
covered my strangely blue lips.
Very bright overhead lights and reassuring voices
as I was whisked along at speed.
It didn’t look like any hospital I had visited before!

Hard gurney turned to soft bed,
hands and arms became medi-ports
as a team of nurses arrived and took over my body.
A respiratory specialist appeared
with a calm and smiling face and tons of knowledge.
Oxygen stayed put.
Bloods taken showed massive infection.

Thank you for getting me here so quickly.
Thank you for such great life saving attention,
I wanted to sleep but your loving faces pulled me back,
thank you both for sleeping over
when the storm appeared,
I was scared but you willed me to stay.

I am still here…
I am so grateful and humbled
I am still here…

April 2024. Dubai.

Imaginings:

I took a walk along the little mews and lanes of my nearby town yesterday, passing by the old Workhouse and on to the Old Dispensary. It was a pleasingly warm almost summer day. I stopped long enough to take this photo but sat further for a while on a nearby wall. I have a good imagination and sat pondering how many times over the years folk had gone with hope in their hearts to collect medicines from this dispensary. I dreamt of how they would have looked, the clothes, whether they walked or cycled or came by horse and cart, or even a carriage., there is a lane immediately alongside after all. Life no doubt would not have been easy and the cost of a doctor great. The chemist sat tightly next to the old workhouse in a small mews with old cottages nearby, reminding me of so many television period dramas.

As I sat I dreamt of another era, of long dresses and capes, of black shiny horses and gallant gentlemen. I dreamt of rogues and vagabonds too and of a life before. I dreamt of child chimney sweeps. I thought of the poverty of some, maybe many? I dreamt of children caught in epidemics with no answer for them. For there were many during this time, influenza, diphtheria, tuberculosis and so many more. I wondered deeply of the folk who lived in the nearby cottages. Still quite beautiful but were they then?

Nestled between two nearby rivers would have meant plenty or rats and the disease they bring. No toilets inside, no electricity but a much simpler way of life but with hardships and a much tougher life.  Still  I’m sure many pleasures dwelt within too!

More than a few I suppose would never ever have left this small town in Lincolnshire and even now this can be the case. My young garden-helper tells me, that he had never been to London but HAS been to Skegness some 20.4 miles away…he is twenty-three! I suspect this is not unusual.

After I had sat for a while dreaming of days gone by, a young lady came and sat nearby with her take-away meal and what seemed like many little pots of tomato sauce, her lunch I suppose,  she proceeded to dot the sauce over everything – we smiled – I am sure it was very tasty but smelt strongly of grease and so much of modern times… I tried not to sigh and not to look at the grease leaking through the paper bag  and thought how all of a sudden  “The great black shiny horses had  came up and licked the frost from my dream…” I turned and continue my walk.

**~The Workhouse was in use from 1735 to 1837 and the Dispensary gave ‘Medical Aid to the Poor’ between 1789 and 1866. The Public Dispensary was also a dental surgery for a time.. Colourwashed
rendered brick with a roof hidden behind a parapet. 2 storey, 3 bay
front with doorway to left, with plain doorcase, overlight and
panelled door. 2 glazing bar sashes to right. 3 glazing bar
sashes above. Dispensary opened in 1789 and was sponsored by Sir
Joseph Banks and was used until 1866. Source: Horncastle Town.

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